Emotional roller coaster.

Other than to not having Arthur here with us, the emotional roller coaster is the worst part of all of this. One day I do pretty well, the next I am a wreck! Some times it will go smooth all morning and then I fall apart at night. Or some mornings I just don’t want to get out of bed at all. I am emotionally exhausted most days. I have to keep reminding myself that it has been such a short time since Arthur left us. This feeling that there should be something I can do to fix it won’t go away. I have always been able to fix every problem that has come up. Not this time. Nothing I do will ever change what has happened to us. No amount of prayer, begging or dare I say deal making will bring Arthur back to us. I have tried it all. There have been times I still go to sleep at night thinking it has all been a horrific nightmare and when I wake up he will be in his room, getting ready to start the day. But it never happens that way. Sorry for the rambling. Just one of those days..