Something has been really weighing on my mind the last several days. You all know that I have tried very hard to be as positive as I could be these last eight months. With great difficulty sometimes I would say. Before Arthur passed I tried to be positive as well. Wasn’t always easy. Life can be challenging at best, and I let it get to me and sometimes, for a while, I forgot who I was and what was important. Now, I feel like I am getting to an actual healing point in all of this. Maybe it is the fact that I know he is still with me, maybe it is just time. I am not sure. But I know that being more positive and living a more grateful life has certainly given me some peace. Everything I do, almost everything, 🙂 I give thanks that I am here and capable of doing it. All that I receive, whether it is rain, money, sunshine or just more birds in my yard, I give thanks. I am also more mindful of my actions. How I speak to people, how I care for my animals, my garden, my home and family. They way I see the world is directly related to how I treat people now. Every person we come across has a purpose in our lives. These things all have a profound effect on life. Should I feel guilt for wanting to laugh and smile? Should I worry that I am not honoring my son by moving forward? I don’t believe so. I know him and he does not want any of us to stop living. I will always miss Artie physically but I cannot make myself and everyone around me suffer for the loss forever. I have a lot of years left and so much more life to live, love to make, smiles to see and laughter to hear.
Try it… When you wake each morning, before you lift you head off of that pillow, say thank you. You made it to another day. How wonderful!
Moving forward
How profound! Thank you for sharing
Life is challenging Lanny and you have done a wonderful job of being positive the past eight months. I don’t know that I could have done as well as you have.
Never feel guilty that you are moving forward and are able to smile and be happy. I am sure this is what Arthur would want you to do. By doing this you are honoring your Son Milann.
As you said it is always a perfect way to start the day by saying thank you for another day.
How very true your words are. I wake up most days since day órla’s passing and try and thank god for the things he has given me, for the life I am free to live, of course I’m shattered and inconsolable some days but I try to stay positive in honour of my child.
I believe as horrible as this pain has been, there has to be some good come of it. Even if it is just to make each moment matter.