I can’t explain what I feel. There are no words in the dictionary to cover the grief we feel when we lose our children. We have no name, nothing to identify us in a crowd. But when we see a mom, a mom that knows, we recognize them immediately. It’s like a signal we send out to the universe to draw in the understanding only another mother has. It is quite beautiful really, how God takes care of us. Our children are not gone from us at all. They physically have left this Earth, but they are forever with us, just as all of our loved ones that have passed are. Just as God always is. And this… This is a beautiful reality once you truly get it. 

I have had some super dark moments since Artie died. I blamed everyone and everything on his suicide, even myself. I have spent a year looking, even begging for answers. I have come to realize there are no answers, the truth is just that this has happened to my family because it was to be. It does not make the pain go away, and it still sucks everyday that I can’t get one of those hugs. But for the first time in my life, I have genuine faith in something. Faith that we are all connected by the Source, by God. We are all the same in our hearts and our Souls are one. We are light and we are energy. We choose our roads long before we come to this life and our Souls know the why. If you are lost, unsure of the way to go, just calm yourself, close your eyes and listen to your Spirit. It will always take you on the right path. Have faith in this, it will never let you down. 

Peace, Happiness and Love to you all!!