Hey Artie

It’s been a little while since I posted something just for you. I have been thinking about you a lot today. Like I don’t every day right? We had a great time on the trip. It was wonderful to spend time with everyone. It wasn’t the same without you though. I am sure we all thought how much you would have loved it there. Cadence and Eli are growing up so fast. I am grateful that they will remember you. Daddy and I missed you a ton. So many things came about that made us think of you. So many times I wanted to say ” Arthur would love this” or “I wish Artie could see this” . I know you were right there with us some times. The song in the dress shop, all the pirate stuff and the Marley flask that was so out of place in Branson. 😀 I swear I could almost hear you say ” I could so skate that” a few times!
Coming home was bittersweet. We were glad to get back but walking through that door without you was hard. Everyday I look for signs from you. In the quiet of the night I listen for your voice.
It’s a new year. Your fifteenth year. You would be getting you driving permit, hanging with your friends and swinging foam. I know you still get to do all of that and more. We are missing all of those things, not you. I would give anything to be sitting watching you. I miss that. You always put everything you had into everything you did, but Amtgard was your calling so to speak. I am sure you were a Pirate in another life! 😜 I am struggling through this life babe. My heart is still in pieces but I think I can do this. There will still be tears and sleepless nights. Nights when I cry myself to sleep. I will always ask myself if there was something I could have done. Images will always flash in my mind of what kind of man you would be. I will never stop loving you, or missing you. And I will never be the same without you. My dear beautiful boy! I love you Arthur. With every fiber of my being. And I will always be the Mother of a true Warrior!!

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