I have been reading tons of books on grief and healing. Stories from other families, moms mostly that have lost their children. Time and time again I hear mothers say they feel as if there is a whole in there hearts. When our daughter Lilly moved to Germany with her family I remember feeling as though a part of me was gone. She and I did everything together and the fact that she and her family were such a huge part of our lives made it almost unbearable when they left. I knew she was just a call away and we would be together again. That feeling slowly faded as the few years they were gone passed.
It is a completely different thing when a child leaves this world. My feelings are purely selfish. I don’t grieve for Arthur. I believe he is with Spirit, having a joyous pain free time all the while watching over us. It is my pain that makes me grieve. My sense of loss, the loss of not only a son but a friend. The loss is ours not his. And the only true loss is the physical one. He still lives within my heart and my memories every second of each day..
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